J. H. Ward's life Blog

A Moment In Time

I know we live in different worlds, we are nothing alike, it simply can never happen you and me.

You are special and I’m just not! But when I look at you I see something that I crave like water for a man walking alone in the desert.

The one time our hands touched I saw a possible future but I know it can’t be ours.

You are like a mystic creature that I can only dream about!

When I walk by you it doesn’t matter where we are I feel like an animal on the hunt for something I know is there but can never find.

I catch you’re scent in the air and my heart begins to pound, sometimes so hard I think it will explode out of my chest. I look everywhere but you are nowhere to be found.

I hear your voice and it calms my soul.

I can be so lost and in pain that I can’t even describe it and then you speak to me and a wave comes over my very being that is so calming, almost to the point that maybe I died and this was my haven and I finally found peace.

Then one day from nowhere we shared a moment in time. A moment that lasted much longer than either of us ever expected and we both knew would come to an end.

During this moment you showed me more love and peace than I have ever known. We talked really about nothing at times but I listened to every word that you spoke.

Sometimes we would not even speak, we only held each other and it was like our minds and our souls became one as if we simply melted into one being sharing everything while we just looked out over the earth watching nature.

Then the day came that we shared our final kiss.

The pain in your eyes and in your voice I knew you loved me but I also knew this day would come, so I held you and felt your body shaking and my words didn’t come easily, the lump in my throat almost choked me but I looked into your eyes and with a quivering voice said baby I do love you so much that I must let you go.

This wasn’t supposed to happen and if I truly love you I must think about your happiness and your future. I can never be the man you need in your life no matter how hard I try I could never make you as happy as you deserve to be.

You looked at me with tears in your eyes and said I do love you and you are the man I need and want for the rest of my life but I knew it wasn’t ever going to make you happy darling, you would always feel pain trying to be more for me when you really never had to be anything but yourself.

We shared a kiss our hands slowly slipped apart and I will never forget the look in your eyes. This was love but the struggles we would put upon each other would be something we could never do.

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